Tweens and Thoughts on Social Media

This week I spoke with a few 4th and 5th graders about their experience with social media and technology. All the students are between 9-11 years old and attend the same school.

Student A doesn't have his own phone, but a lot of his friends do. His experience of social media is through his mom. He hates that she is constantly snapping pictures of him and posting it online for everyone to see. He feels embarrassed and hopes his friends don't see all the pictures, but they always do. He shows up to school and finds out his mom posted another picture and his school mates poke fun at him. He has told his mom to stop posting the pictures to Facebook, but she won't stop.

Student B has her own phone and a public TikTok account. She is hoping to get discovered one day and become famous from her videos. She has over 100 followers - most are people she doesn't know. She loves how she learns all the newest dances and is the first of her friends to know them. She feels really good when she gets likes. She gets anxious when she doesn't have her phone and can't check to see if she has any new followers and likes. When she is at home, all she wants to do is watch TikToks and make new TikToks.

Student C has a phone without a phone number. She uses it to go on YouTube to watch music videos and Azzyland. She also likes to play Minecraft, but her mom doesn't let her message anyone through the game. When she was 7, she messaged with someone from a  game and her mom saw the messages and got really angry. The person asked her for her age and address. Since then, her mom made her promise to not message anyone through games that she doesn't know in person. If she does, and her mom finds out, her electronics will be taken away. If she wants to download a new game, she has to ask her mom for permission first. She wants TikTok. She doesn't understand it, but she wants it because all of her friends have it. She feels left out on game day at school because all of her friends bring their phones to make TikTok videos and she doesn't know what they are doing. She wishes her friends. Her mom said she can have social media after she graduates from 8th grade in a few years. She took the Wait Until 8th Pledge.

Image from https://twitter.com/WaitUntil8th/photo

All three students have been posted in pictures on their school's Facebook page. They like the attention they get and feel famous in their school when their friends see their pictures online. What they all found weird was when they would get home, their parents already knew what they did at school that day. Student A didn't like how that made him feel. He said he felt like he was being spied on. Student B said she loves when her pictures are online. It makes her feel good when someone mentions it to her that they saw her on Facebook. Student C mostly likes the attention, but admitted that sometimes it makes her feel weird. 

Big Little Hearts Broken

Yesterday, my daughters' hearts were broken. Their father told them that he has a girlfriend - and she has a daughter - and she is pregnant with their sister. He showed them pictures of him with her, with her daughter, and with her really big belly.

The therapist told me that my baby girl immediately cried. The other gritted through her teeth and muttered how 'happy' she is with a look of shock on her face. She told me she feels sorry for them. I held back my tears and drove them home.

My oldest daughter had that look of shock on her face all evening until she went to bed and told me that she feels confused by everything. She barely said a word about it all night. She tried to hold it all in and pretends like she didn't just hear a story that is shattering her world as she knows it.

My baby girl looked to me so full of sadness and told me "I don't want to have a half-sister."

My baby girl looked to me so full of anger and told me "How could Daddy do this? He's not even married to her."

My baby girl looked to me so full of hurt and told me "He's still married to you." and what I saw in her eyes killed me inside.

My baby girl looked to me so full of pain and told me "I wish Daddy didn't tell us."

Two weeks ago my baby girl asked her father if he had a girlfriend and he deflected. Made a joke instead of giving an answer. She believed he didn't have a girlfriend and when she told me she breathed a air of relief. Tonight her breaths are short, like she can't catch it. They sit in front a mug of chamomile and start counting the months from now to when their new baby sister will arrive and realize that their father has been lying to them. "She is due in three months Mommy." He has been lying to them for at least 6 months.

I knew. I knew because he leaves a trail behind him. I knew because three months ago I saw that he used our joint bank account to pay for her 3-D ultrasound. I knew because his family put up pictures of them on Facebook.

I knew the day would come when he would break their hearts, the same he did to mine. I didn't know he would do it so soon. I didn't know how much more this would hurt. NO matter what I did, I couldn't protect them from him. I haven't been able to cry tears in years, but tonight, I can't stop.

This past year, they have seen the worst from their father. They are piecing together more and more of the story. The broken walls, the broken doors, and now the broken hearts. "Mommy, why doesn't this door close?" "Mommy, I remember when Daddy tried to punch you. He missed your head. He hit the wall right here." "Mommy, Daddy broke a lot of things."

A year ago he told them that he didn't want a divorce. He told them it was "Mommy's fault" that we are getting one. It's "Mommy's fault" that he had to move out. Now I can see their minds working to understand more of this broken marriage. They are putting all the pieces together.

Yesterday my daughters' hearts were broken. I feel helpless.

What is Digital Literacy?

A friend shared an article with me and I have been introduced to the 5 Digital Literacies as explained by Howard Rheingold. The concept is not new, as the article was written nearly 10 years ago, but still valid.

When you learn a language, you don’t just learn how to listen to and read it, but you also learn how to speak and write with it. Rheingold’s 5 digital literacies as explained in the article are: Attention, Participation, Collaboration, Network Awareness, and Critical Consumption seem to focus mainly on the 1st part of learning a language – listening and understanding. I think the term Digital Literacy as used by Rheingold is a misnomer. It should be called Information Literacy. As important as these 5 components are, if we truly want to be Digitally Literate, we must be able to engage in and drive the conversation.

Imagine this – we are all sitting in a vehicle and we all have a seat. Where are you sitting? Are you in the back seat, just watching and reading? You are sitting back and not really engaging online but a huge consumer of content. Are you in the passenger seat – active with the 5 digital literacies that Rheingold shares? You are paying attention and learning what others are writing and discussing, even publishing a bit of your world online. You are actively participating in discussions and adding your opinions. Or are you the driver – a real player in the digital world – not only using the tools that other drivers have given (Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, Blogging…) but designing and creating new roads for others to travel (new platforms)?

I think if you want to be considered truly Digitally Literate, you need to understand the economics and business behind the online platforms, behind the apps, behind all of the software. You can’t just learn how to use today’s technology, but you should engage in creating and driving tomorrow’s new software and technology.

Back to Rheingold’s 5 ‘digital’ literacies, I think Critical Consumption is of highest importance among them. You need to be able to think critically in today’s world of Big Data and constant flow of information. How does one decide which articles to read, and which ones to pass up? How do you look analytically at the final report or article and see how data could be manipulated to tell one side of the story over another? How can you be different than a machine? Take a look at this image from Harold Jarche and notice what makes humans different from machines. We have creativity, imagination, and relationships.

Source: Jarche on Twitter

He echoes much of Rheingold’s ideas, but pushes the idea of collaboration and sharing ideas a bit further. I love this article https://jarche.com/2018/11/network-literacies/  by Jarche that discusses the core skill of critical thinking in gaining fluency.

SOPPA, Hackers, and Student Privacy

Sometimes adults - as well intention their actions may be - just don't get it. Take for example the new changes to the Student Online Personal Protection Act (SOPPA, Public Act 101-516) that require school districts in Illinois to post publicly, on their website, which third party vendors, government agencies, and whatnot they work with and what sensitive information is given to them about students.

Talk about a security issue. Let's tell the whole online world (including unethical hackers) exactly what information they can obtain about minors and who they can obtain it from by hacking third party vendors all in the name of transparency. As if there weren't enough news stories about schools being targeted by cyber criminals, I foresee there being a lot more attacks. Just this week, there was a news story in Washington about the uptake in the frequency of cyber attacks towards schools. Take a look:



Here is another story with advice on what you can do to protect your data and what to do if you feel your data has been breached:


In August of last year, Sean Gallagher reported that "According to Armor's data, schools have become the second-largest pool of ransomware victims-slightly behind local governments and closely followed by healthcare organizations."

Map of 2019 ransomware attacks provided by Armor on ARS Technica

Maybe politicians should be more concerned about supporting schools and school districts in protecting students' data instead of offering it up on a silver platter. More often than not, schools don't have the resources available to comply with the numerous student privacy laws and their amendments.

Your Online Reputation (and our childrens') and How to Improve It

Your online reputation goes by many names: Digital Footprint, Digital Tattoo, Digital Shadow, Personal Brand. It is super rare to find anyone that doesn't have some type of reputation online.

If you are ever looking to be accepted into a school, looking to be hired for a new job, join in on a club, or even dating someone new, you may very well be googled. They are looking for the answer to the question, "Who are you?" What will people see when they Google your name? What photos or videos pop up? That is part of your online reputation.

Meme Created with http://www.quickmeme.com/

Seth Godin, well-known American marketing and leadership author has some great advice for how to improve your online reputation:

Everything you do now ends up in your permanent record. The best plan is to overload Google with a long tail of good stuff and to always act as if you're on Candid Camera, because you are. -Seth Godin

I had a chance to grow up with out everyone having a smart phone in their pocket, but our younger generations wont' have that. Everything they do seems to end up online and part of their "permanent record."

Meme created by author on https://imgflip.com/

Do you have children that have signed up for social media accounts? Do they visit websites to work on school projects? Have you talked about what a good digital citizen looks like with your child? Don't wait for their teachers to have this conversation at school. Talk with your kids about the Internet, what they are doing online and learn how to be a good digital citizen.


Below are a couple of resources you can use to begin the conversation with them.


7 Techniques for Building Your Personal Digital Footprint - Digital Marketing Magazine

Tips for Online Reputation Management of your Personal Brand - Quill

How to Clean Up your Online Reputation - Reputation Management

Acceptable Use and Technology Policies

Where I work, there are many technology policies. The newest one stems from the initiative for middle school students to go 1:1 with laptops. This is our first year trying it out, and I find the Student Technology Contract hilarious, yet effective. Take a look.

Student Technology Contract [digital image]. Anonymous, 2019.

If a student doesn't take care of their laptop, it will get taken away and it will be replaced with an older version or revert to pen and paper. I find this so funny.

One of the things I wish they would have added to this would be the use of social media, even though most of the students are not old enough based on the Terms of Service Agreements for the social media sites., many of them lie about their age to get accounts.

While on the district network, sites like Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat and the like are blocked, even for staff, unless they are on their own connection to the internet. There is Board Policy that relates to staff use of technology as well and it includes the use of personal devices and district provided devices. The last time it was updated was 2018. When you are a new hire in the district, you also have to sign a technology use contract. 

The basics of the Board Policy for the Usage and Conduct of Technology are:
"All use of the District’s electronic networks must be: (1) in support of education and/or research, and be in furtherance of the goals stated herein, or (2) for legitimate school business purpose. Use is a privilege, not a right. Board of Education Members have no expectation of privacy in any material that is stored, transmitted, or received via the District’s electronic networks or District computers."


All the rest of the language refers to other policies such as Privacy, Ethics, Conduct, Family Educational Rights and Privacy Act (FERPA) and Copyright.

The District doesn't allow teachers to post anything related to students on their private social media accounts. There is a best practice of submitting their photos to the official school Twitter and Facebook accounts to be posted there. One simple reason is that parents/guardians haven't given permission for individuals to post information about their children publicly. As a parent myself, I'm grateful for this. I should be the one that decides what is published publicly about my child.

Here are a couple of great posts that fall closely in line with my beliefs on the oversharing teachers are doing online from the classroom: https://funnymonkey.com/2016/students-and-social-media and here is part II: https://funnymonkey.com/2016/students-directory-information-and-social-media---part-2

Many teachers don't realize that by posting pictures of their students, they are more than likely posing a risk to those students. I know of a recent story (not in the district I work in) where a family had to be relocated after a picture of the student showed up on social media. The family was in witness protection prior to the photo being released. I can't even imagine how much guilt that teacher felt after that happened. 

Online Privacy

Have you ever thought about privacy and the internet? I've been recently readying up on various articles and listening to various conversations in regards to this subject.

Once in a while, the public on social media goes up in arms when a new policy is put in place. Do you remember when everyone didn't want to sign up for Facebook Messenger as a separate app on their phone because doing so would invade our privacy? Most people I know ended up downloading the app eventually. In order to improve the user experience, it became a 'must' for users to download and give permissions to Facebook.

As it relates to privacy, I came across two interesting reads:
Do You Know How Much Private Information You Give Away Every Day?
https://time.com/4673602/terms-service-privacy-security/

Extreme Privacy: What it takes to disappear in America
https://inteltechniques.com/data/workbook.pdf

I think this discussion on privacy is important to have. I've noticed a divide between generations. The younger generations tend to lean towards openness and don't necessarily put a value to their privacy. Every app asks for permissions to use our information and in order to use the app, we give those permissions away even if we don't read what we are agreeing to.

I find that when I speak with older generations, the opposite is true. Who wants to feel like they're being watched all the time?

I reflected on how I react to the idea of privacy. It definitely affects my learning space. The more aware I become about how I am being tracked, the more concerned I am. I delete my data on Google regularly. I don't sign up for websites in order to get access to an article to read. I will find another way around that, or I will just find a different source and not read that article at all. The barriers to information have become a question of how much information am I willing to give up about myself.

Maybe I'm a bit paranoid, but I do like to have my privacy respected, and I don't like the idea that I could be attached to a location based on my Tweets, Google Maps, or any other app that I carry around daily.